As I reflect on this past weekend I cannot help but smile. Family traveled a few hours in to celebrate an early Easter with us since baby #2 is due shortly and we no longer live near them. It was supposed to be a relaxing, fun, enjoyable weekend…that it was, along with a lot of tantrums from the teething toddler.

The beginning

Our subdivision was hosting an Easter Egg Hunt in our park. We live in Michigan, which means March can be warm or freezing cold. On this beautiful day it was a whopping 39 degrees outside. I bundled Nora up in her winter garb, she had a slight resemblance to the Michelin man. Packed her up in the stroller and headed down to the park. 

She just stood there

With all her extra layers on she had refused to walk. She stared blankly with snot dripping down her face at all the pretty Easter eggs, along with kids running everywhere. The other kiddos were running, getting eggs and having a grand ole time, while mine just stood. My family took photos of her just standing still. I felt like a fraud inviting them to this exciting egg hunt for her to stand there. This is totally not what I had imagined, lol. I helped her collect her 10 allotted eggs, which basically included me giving her an egg, and then she put it in her bucket. No smiles. Clearly she was not thrilled and just wanted to go home.

Not what expected for her first Easter egg hunt but she is only 16 months old so I can understand the confusion and inability to walk with what looked like 8 extra layers of clothes on. We headed back home and then it began.

What monster is this?

Every time I walked away, looked in a different direction, tried to pee, put her down, eat the exact same thing she was eating…well you get the idea she cried out “momma” and broke down crying. I felt terrible for her and me at the same time. I didn’t want my baby sad or missing me, but come on! I just wanted to eat my Easter lunch in some slight peace. All those months I just wished she would say “momma” and not “dada” I was quickly regretting. There are two of us. Why can’t she beg dad for his food? I digress. But seriously though? 

A few massive diaper blowouts (weren’t we past the stage) equaled multiple unexpected baths. A refusal to eat anything other than Pedialtye Popsicle, yogurt, water and milk caused for an even crankier hungry child. A nap schedule that was all messed up meant more crying tears and snuggles. Plus a tooth that just won’t break through. This was a perfect storm for this 16-month-old girl. 

Seriously though, whose monster is this?

In 48 hours I had never experienced her cry, whine, scream, flail her little body, kick her legs and flop on the floor as much as she did. It wasn’t constant, but when it happened it looked as if it was straight out of a movie. Classic tantrum throwing child. Trying to help my mom cook dinner was no longer a possibility. I kept having to take her up to her room and calm her down. Holding a steady conversation wasn’t going to happen, and as much as I love my husband he was not getting the cues to give me a break from her.

As a recovering perfectionist I could have let this outburst ruin my weekend. We had plans that needed to be put on the back burner because someone (cough, cough) was a hot mess. I tried to smile thinking this is only a phase, don’t let this affect my families visit down while the monster was sobbing in my arms. Inside I was thoroughly embarrassed because clearly her behavior was a direct reflection of me.

I’m a good momma

Since that wonderfully stressful easter egg hunt, I have found that a screaming semi out of control child is a phase and has no reflection on me as a parent. Re-read that. A screaming semi out of control child is a phase and has no reflection of YOU as a parent.

Bottom line. Sometimes plans change because your kids need a little extra TLC. Not every holiday will be picture perfect. Life is full of moments whether crazy or not, learning to find the joy in all of them is so fun! Though it would have been nice if she enjoyed the easter egg hunt more.